Adventures in Castle Dracula
by Harpokrates
Summary: Their meeting might have been fate. But, if that was so, fate was unreasonably cruel and enjoyed Hector's suffering. Rated for language. Eventual HectorxIsaac


The creepy bastard at the checkout was making eyes at him again.

Hector huffed and hunched his shoulders further, scanning the aisle of make-up. Apparently, there was not one, but twelve shades of black, and he didn't know if Maria wanted 'soulless black' or 'charcoal raven'. Hector frowned, why was it so hard to shop for his little sister? And what sort of thirteen year old wanted ripped fishnet stockings and a corset for her birthday?

He sighed.

Twenty-four and he was out of school, with a masters in Bioengineering. He wasn't living with his parents and he had a steady job as a lab technician. Really, he had no obligation to buy things for his bratty little sister's birthday at some stupid pseudo-punk store. And what kind of store's name was Castle Dracula anyway?

Hector Renard sighed again and selected 'eternal torment' from the rack of nail polish. He put the bottle in the basket he was carrying and looked over the list of things Maria wanted.

Tights, check.

Nail polish, check.

Bust-Enhancing corset...

Definitely not check.

Hector frowned at the list, mentally berating both his parents for allowing her to ask for such a thing and Maria for asking for one. He glanced around the store, there were the hoodies, the nostalgic tee-shirts, the vast selection of piercings for ears, belly-buttons, faces, and... other parts, but no corsets.

He realized that the only employee in the surprisingly empty store, and thus, the only one who could help him find anything, was the strange red-headed cashier who seemed torn between undressing Hector with his eyes, and applying frightening amounts of eyeliner.

Hector weighed his options. On one hand, if he got the corset he would have to talk to the cashier, who creeped him out, but on the other, he would have to face Maria throwing a tantrum the way only a hormonal pre-teen girl could, and then face his parent's anger for 'upsetting your poor little sister' if he didn't. 

He groaned internally and made his way to the check-out like prisoner making his way to the guillotine.

_'Damn these antisocial tendencies of mine.'_

He walked up to the desk and coughed to get the cashier's attention. The red-head looked up from his mirror and Hector couldn't help but be reminded very strongly of a raccoon.

"What," He drawled. "do _you _want?"

Hector gaped. That... _asshole_! He wanted no more than reach over the counter and punch the man in the face, and then possibly cut him up into small pieces with a sword.

Instead of breaking multiple laws, he took a deep breath, adjusted his glasses, and counted to ten in his head.

"Could you help me find," He squinted at Maria's list."a, uh, Bust-Enhancing Corset?"

The cashier raised an eyebrow and glanced at Hector's chest.

'You do know those are for women, right?

Hector flushed red.

"It isn't for me!" He screeched.

The cashier stood up and rolled his eyes. He was tall, taller than Hector, at least, but that wasn't saying much, as Hector barely scraped 5'6". He wore a black wife-beater that failed to entirely cover the plethora of tattoos that covered his chest and arms. His red hair was shoulder length, and was swept over his left eye. As he stepped out from behind the counter, Hector noticed a name tag pinned to the bottom of his shirt. He tilted his head and read 'Isaac Laforeze, Cashier'. So, the creeper had a name, not that Hector had any intention of using it. Creeper he was and Creeper he would stay.

As he stepped fully out from behind the counter, Hector noticed his pants, if they could be called that.

_'Wouldn't having giant gaping holes in the sides of your clothes get cold?'_

His stiletto-heeled knee-high boots didn't help to reduce his creeper status either.

"Follow me." Creeper's arrogant voice broke Hector's train of thought and he realized he had been staring.

Hector scowled, but couldn't help but notice that Isaac's hips swayed when he walked.

Entirely creeped out with himself, he readjusted his glasses, and followed the other man.

It turned out that the corsets were located directly behind the cosmetics where Hector had just been. Isaac shifted his weight to one hip and scowled a bit.

"Is this what you're looking for?"

Hector scowled back and sharply nodded, and Isaac spun around and strutted back to the counter. Hector caught himself staring again and smacked himself across the face. Irritated with himself, he selected the corset that Maria wanted in the size he thought she wore. He turned around and strode back to the counter, wanting nothing more than to go home and forget that this had ever happened and then maybe solve some algorithms and read another report about altering genomes. He placed the corset, tights, and nail polish on the counter and pulled his wallet out of the back pocket of his jeans.

Isaac's voice broke the silence. " That'll be $47.49."

Hector blanched at the price, and pulled his credit card out of his wallet. An awkward silence reigned throughout the store, broken only by the skritching of Hector's pen as he signed the receipt. He handed the the paper back to the cashier, and reached for his credit card.

Creeper didn't let go.

Hector's face settled into a glare.

"Let go." His voice was hard, and angry.

"Why don't you make me?" Creeper's voice was teasing.

"Now." It lowered into a dangerous growl.

Creeper leaned in closer, until their faces were only inches apart.

"I said 'make me'." He whispered.

He closed the gap, and kissed Hector.

Like, really kissed him. With tongue and everything. With his face so close, Hector noticed his hawkish nose and clear green-blue eyes, as well as what looked like an old faded tattoo over one eye.

Hector froze. Then, Creeper bit his bottom lip and he unfroze.

He swung his fist with as much force as he could and in the same movement, tore his card away from creeper's grasp.

There was a loud satisfying crack as his punch hit Creeper, misaligning his nose even further.

Hector turned on his heel and stormed out of the front door, not stopping until he was sitting safely in his car, the doors locked.

His hand hurt, his head hurt, his mouth hurt, and he wanted to go home.

After taking a second, to breathe deeply and calm down, he started his car.

Oh, right, the receipt.

Hector had made it routine to check all of his receipts, in case one was ever wrong, and also maybe a little to practice math, but he would never admit it.

As he glanced at the paper, he noticed two words and a string of digits scrawled near the bottom of the page.

Call Me.

412-867-5309

Hector crumpled the paper into a ball and threw it to the floor, shuddering. Getting screamed at by Maria would have been preferable to _that_.

He fixed his glasses and drove away.

][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][

Isaac listened until he heard the sound of the door slamming shut before bursting into laughter. He kept cackling until the woman from the kiosk outside started glaring at him through the glass for scaring away her customers.

He rolled his eyes at her and leaned back into the edge of the counter, fixing his hair and wiping blood away from his nose. The little nerd sure could pack a punch. He grimaced and quickly popped his nose back into place.

But still, that was the most fun he had had in ages, especially after his bills had come and he realized that he could keep either his internet or his hot water.

_'Mental note,' _He mused. _'be sure to torment nerd-boy if I ever see him again.'_

After all, a good laugh was well worth a broken nose.

][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][

A/N: Alright, starting an AU. Wonderful. Please review!

Edit: Right, I got too excited and posted before I really edited the chapter. I realized that I made Hector too wimpy and Isaac was not nearly creepy enough. Oops. Here's the edit, which I feel is better.


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